Reinvention - Another Version of Drastic

I feel like I need to get drastic about some other stuff in my life. I am far to focused on everyone else's problems and still less focused on taking care of me. I seem to get stuck in feelings (negative ones) and don't get nearly as much out of life as I could if I turned my sights toward something pleasant more often.

I have a book for reading after a breakup. It's a funny, but very insightful and practical book. I got it out (finally) and was reading in it yesterday. It has a chapter on the "breakover" meaning a makeover after your breakup. To get a person moving on. It is all about moving on, really, the whole book, and avoiding staying stuck in negative thinking. So I am going to start my breakover today. It is about emerging from experiences with a better version of myself.

I am trying to compile a list of new things to do that I have been wanting to do but put off for whatever reason. Then I am going to pick some things to do and do them. I am also going to clean that room of mine which looks more like a giant, messy storage facility than a bedroom. It has loads of potential, just needs some time and effort. And a bunch of trash bags.. I have a goal to make an impact by the end of the weekend. I want a noticeable difference. Otherwise I will post embarrassing photos of it on my blog.

I need positive activities to focus on. Things to look forward to. I need these to balance out the other stuff I have to deal with. Support groups are good, and I have some of those but I need fun, enrichment, excitement, creativity, intellectual gratification and so on. I don't want to just survive. I WANT TO THRIVE!!!!!!

OK. So here are some of my ideas

Plant the flowers and put in a bench or swing in the grassy area of the back yard. Do some decorating. Get the patio ready and have people over. I have friends, I just need to call and invite them over, even if it is just one at a time.

Get the camera battery (stolen by electronics hijacking teenage daughter) and start taking pictures again. Get the slideshow software and put together the slideshow that's been in my head for about a year now.

Take Bass lessons. I have the guitar. Bite the bullet. Spend the money, sign up for a month or so of weekly lessons and see if I like playing. If not, I can move the giant amp out of my room and clear some space.

Take charge of the bedroom, spend a little money and redesign my spaces for music, computer work, etc. Make it pretty.

Get a pedicure, or some other beautifying spa-like thing done.

Go to a new church, one with a singles group, and go to the singles thing. I am single so how about hanging out with some single people.

Those are just a few things. I need to make a bigger list and put things on them even if they don't seem possible right now.

I need to get out of the lowgrade funky feeling I have been having. I am sick of it. It is like a black cloud - I start feeling good and then I go "oh yea, blah blah blah (insert negative situations like brother, kids in prison, break up, and so on)" and then I let that gloomy thing creep over me again, and I feel like I can't do anything. But I can do stuff. Perhaps I need a mantra like "I can do stuff" to say over and over again.

That's my Friday inspiration.