Drasticize

Time to drasticize. I have been nibbling indiscriminately and of course gained a few pounds. Nothing serious but I am at my limit of fluctuation. I nibbled things I normally stay away from like marshmallows, brownies, chips, crackers and so on. Plus I had evening/night eating issues. But I know what to do.. cut out the sugar, and junk, make a plan and have the good stuff on hand. When I walk in the door and immediately start cooking dinner, the urge to nibble sets in, so I can keep nibble foods on hand like celery and other raw veggies.

I never stray too far anymore, but I know when I am straying. I have been working out regularly and not obsessing over weight/food. I just got a little lax in my food. So easy to do and I wish I could get away with it... But the scale and that bloated feeling remind me - they get my attention - and keep me grounded in reality. Reality is that if I continue to eat that way, I will creep on and on up the scale. Plus, I won't have that clean, fit and peaceful feeling that I have come to enjoy so much. I will have that bloated, out of control feeling.

So it's a drastic day, a clean day, whatever I want to call it. I have a plan and supplies. I am keeping track. I'll have gym on my lunch hour as usual. Evening is my challenging point so I will be looking for ways to avoid the nibbling syndrome.

Thanks everyone for your comments on my photo. I wanted to post better photos but never got to it so I took a quickie in spite of the peacock hair. I want to post a shorts photo and perhaps a couple of others. It is good to see the changes, and to get feedback.

I also found some interesting old "before" photos on an old hard drive. It is amazing to see them. I don't think I realized what was going on with me at that point with food and my weight. I stayed in denial much of the time which is probably a good thing, after all. I had a lot of victories and good times during those years. My career progressed very well, I had a wonderful and very close relationship with my daughter - her childhood was very enjoyable for both of us. We took vacations and mini-holidays on weekends. Those were good years. I dated during those years off and on as well. So it's not like I look back at the years of my obesity as bad or sad or horrible. There were many, many accomplishments and joys. But there was a constant struggle going on within myself - with food, and other things. There was a lot of untreated depression and repressed anger. I am glad that I have begun to address those issues and make significant progress.

Anyway, more will be revealed. I am still going with the flow. But the food flow needs to slow down a bit!!