I can't tell you if I accomplished anything today.....but I don't care. This was a complete I don't care day. I did care about what I ate, though, I was not super drastic, but I was careful. I will go back on super drastic tomorrow.
I had no car, I slept in, I called the insurance people. I called the rental car place and found out that I could not get a car, and I did not care. In fact I was kinda glad. I talked on the phone to some friends. I also was told that the X was going out with someone, but not from a reliable source. And get this, it actually made me feel good in a weird sort of way. Kind of a feeling of finality. I guess I was sort of hanging on to that little dream of him showing up as a completely changed man and begging me to take him back. More realistic though is the fact that he more than likely found someone more suited to the way he is now. Which is what I can do. Be with someone who does not need to change, someone who is good for me the way they are now. What a concept, right???
I was supposed to meet a guy today. But cancelled because of the car accident thing. He was a guy from the dating website. I am still hesitant about that sort of thing but thought I'd go ahead and meet this one. He appears to be responsible, gainfully employed, drivers license and car, in fact apparently has five cars and mortorcycle. My age. Perhaps a tad overweight. Likes some of the same things I like to do. He had a kind face so I decided to meet him. And eventually most likely will but I am not putting much into it, just doing it to socialize with little if any expectations. It is nice to feel this way about it. The no expectations part. Actually I feel like I am making myself do it so I will move on.
I have done some work in my room, a little at a time. And, planted a few more flowers. It has rained much and the ground is soggy and easy to plant. Took a walk for exercise yesterday in spite of the car accident. And I am going to make myself take a walk tonight. I ate white rice and now I feel guilty.
I am still pushing for those one forties. Two pounds to my interim goal, which I have already decided to take off three more after that and then stop losing for a while. Work on fitness. I want to get excited about life again, but feel kinda down today. thought too much about the X this weekend and then found out the tidbit of gossip. Why is it that I break up with a guy, knowing he is not good for me, and then I am sad that he does not miraculously change, just for me, and come back begging??? I need a reality check.
more will be revealed.....
I had no car, I slept in, I called the insurance people. I called the rental car place and found out that I could not get a car, and I did not care. In fact I was kinda glad. I talked on the phone to some friends. I also was told that the X was going out with someone, but not from a reliable source. And get this, it actually made me feel good in a weird sort of way. Kind of a feeling of finality. I guess I was sort of hanging on to that little dream of him showing up as a completely changed man and begging me to take him back. More realistic though is the fact that he more than likely found someone more suited to the way he is now. Which is what I can do. Be with someone who does not need to change, someone who is good for me the way they are now. What a concept, right???
I was supposed to meet a guy today. But cancelled because of the car accident thing. He was a guy from the dating website. I am still hesitant about that sort of thing but thought I'd go ahead and meet this one. He appears to be responsible, gainfully employed, drivers license and car, in fact apparently has five cars and mortorcycle. My age. Perhaps a tad overweight. Likes some of the same things I like to do. He had a kind face so I decided to meet him. And eventually most likely will but I am not putting much into it, just doing it to socialize with little if any expectations. It is nice to feel this way about it. The no expectations part. Actually I feel like I am making myself do it so I will move on.
I have done some work in my room, a little at a time. And, planted a few more flowers. It has rained much and the ground is soggy and easy to plant. Took a walk for exercise yesterday in spite of the car accident. And I am going to make myself take a walk tonight. I ate white rice and now I feel guilty.
I am still pushing for those one forties. Two pounds to my interim goal, which I have already decided to take off three more after that and then stop losing for a while. Work on fitness. I want to get excited about life again, but feel kinda down today. thought too much about the X this weekend and then found out the tidbit of gossip. Why is it that I break up with a guy, knowing he is not good for me, and then I am sad that he does not miraculously change, just for me, and come back begging??? I need a reality check.
more will be revealed.....
posted by Cindy at
7:19 PM
3 Comments:
Cindy, I am so glad you are okay after the accident. Gosh, those are scary. You have an unbelievably healthy attitude about it. I like that a lot. I feel that way most of the time--that things happen (even bad things) when they are supposed to, and we have to roll with it b/c God has other plans in store for us that we have no clue about.
Look at you getting so skinny! That super drastic is paying off. 140s, here you come!
Cindy, hope you are doing okay!
Reality check, "When Food Is Love" by Geneen Roth. "Exploring The Relationship Between Food and Love." This book blew my socks off. Explained my attraction to all those people who were so bad for me and to me. I read the darn thing in one day.
I am also glad you are okay. Gad you do roll with the punches girl. Rest, rest, rest.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home