New Number Alert

I saw the new number. It was 169. There has not been a 16_ anything on my scale since maybe 1999 or early 2000 but I am thinking 1999. That is eight years. I am still in training school (they should call it eating school) so here is my food resistance report. There were muffins this morning. But they had labels and I read them. I decided to have one because it had 210 calories even though it had 10 g of fat. I figured the fat might keep me satisfied for a while. It did all the way up until lunch. Lunch was ordered in BBQ which I had chosen white meat. I peeled the skin off and the sauce was on the side so I just did a little dipping. I immediately gave away the two gigantic butter dripping garlic bread slices. My fingers were greasy just touching them. They smelled tempting so they had to be removed instantly from my reach. I had a side of slaw and a side of potato salad. I know these most likely contained more mayo than I'd use in mine but I enjoyed them. In the afternoons I dig through the snack basket and get the little 90 calorie bag of granola bites while everyone else munches chips and cookies. I don't care. I saw the 16 on the scale this morning and I want that more than the cookies.

Maybe I can have a no fat or very low fat dinner to balance the fats in my breakfast and lunch. I feel good about my choices and my adaptations. I enjoyed my food. I took a very long time to eat the muffin. I nibbled over time. I stopped halfway and waited. I played with it. I eventually finished it.

I saw that boy again last night. He sure is sweet. I feel we can talk about anything. He is respectful of boundaries that I now appear to have. He reminds me often that he wants to hear everything I have to say. He also remembers things I have said in the past and details about weeks ago when we first met. He opens up about feelings and stuff. Do you think he is from another planet? I can't get over it. I am not sure if he is real or not.

Time to report back to eating, I mean training school.