Monday, June 25, 2007

I forgot to weigh in this morning. I was in a hurry. I am a training session all week long from 8 to 5 each day. They commented on how good they feed us and said people gain weight in the training week, but not so for this one. Being a corporate employee in the group I can opt out of the lunches and I can skip the morning goodies, so I am. My goal is to lose during the week. I weighed last night and I was close to a pound less than last week so I am thinking I will have a loss but won't know until tomorrow. Normally my eveining weight is my highest weight.

I have had two dates with the man. Last night's date was the date I imagined having. We walked at a park by the river and down onto a gravel bar where the sound of water and the cool breeze refreshed and relaxed me. We sat in the woods, secluded and shaded, and talked. We went walking down the cobblstone street with shops and then shared a salad (what guy shares a salad??? that and other amazing traits..) in a booth at a small italian place. Then we walked back along the river in the night air back to the park. We spent a little more time woods again this time with stars and sky peeking through the trees. That was a very romantic part. This guy talks about feelings. And he listens to me. And he asks questions if he is unsure, and does not make assumptions. He also has assured me, more than once, that he wants to hear everything I have to say. I assume because he wants to get to know me. This is a huge change for me from my past with men. It is very nice. I am enjoying it. It was the date I have envisioned as my little dream date when I moved here and thought about going on the riverfront, wishing I had that special someone to do those things with. What a great gift to get a small wish.

Anyway, let's not get too carried away with boy talk. My appetite has been less and I am still tired and not I am still a little under the weather. I had to go to Six Flags Saturday so there was no rest until yesterday. My sleep has not been good either. My business trip is in two weeks and I want to make sure I take care of things related to that. I am still up in the air on who will water plants, care for pets, and kids. I have a couple of options and I am still weighing them before making a final decision. I am also still working on changing my negative thoughts. I catch myself and try to re-examine and replace with another way of looking at the situation. It is not as time consuming as it sounds and I hope it becomes a habit. I want my communications to improve in that the statments I make to other people could convey more optimisim, if possible. Or at least not some negative image or label I have been branding myself, or the world with for years without re-examining. That's my hope.

I hope I start sleeping better. There are projects around the house waiting for a peppier me to come along and take action. For now I forgive myself for not being up to the challenge, and I lay down if I am too tired. Sooner or later I will get better and do these things. I don't know if there is a point to this post but I wanted to get on and post because it keeps me grounded. It is almost the end of the month and I want to see if I can make my small goal which is about only two pounds away from last night's weight. I could be there and I just don't know it yet. Gotta run back to training. Oops I am late..

3 Comments:

Blogger Bea said...

I have started blowing kisses at myself in every mirror I pass. Not as romantic as your current situation, but it works. Cheers.

3:11 PM  
Blogger Cindy said...

I think blowing kisses at my reflection would be even more important to me right now than any romance with a man. I have some exercises from my book that include saying things into the mirror. Years back there would be no way I could do it but I am getting better. I started out just looking at my eyes in a small mirror. But I love the blowing kisses, thanks.

5:17 PM  
Blogger Lori G. said...

Aww, Cindy, this is a wonderful post. What a nice time you've had. He sounds wonderful but then again, he's getting to know an equally wonderful woman. You deserve that kind of a guy.

I'm glad you can opt out of lunches; I find work can be the biggest enabler of foods.

I think we need a spray, "Negative Thoughts Be Gone!" Imagine how much money we could make AND how much nicer life could be for people if it were that easy.

8:02 AM  

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